


Tamaki's Dirty Mind

by FennecFoundaPencil



Category: Ouran High School Host Club - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, I hate it, Lemon, Meme, Pegging, Smut, joke, the twins are perverts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-16
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:01:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26501794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FennecFoundaPencil/pseuds/FennecFoundaPencil
Summary: This is the worst thing I've written I'm gonna cry
Relationships: Fujioka Haruhi/Suoh Tamaki
Comments: 12
Kudos: 37





	Tamaki's Dirty Mind

Haruhi awoke from her slumber to the sound of the door unlocking. Two figures slipped into her room, one lifting a finger to his mouth to shush her. She tilted her head and lifted a hand to flick on the light beside her bed. It was past two in the morning, what could the twins possibly want at such a time? 

“We couldn't sleep, so we had a better idea,” Hikaru explained, sitting on the edge of her bed. Haruhi rubbed the sleep from her eyes, barely awake. The words coming from the twins seemed to fall flat on her ears. In fact, it seemed they were still talking even now and she could barely understand a word. 

“So- You up for it?” Kaoru asked, hand up in nonchalance. 

“Uh, sure,” Haruhi had no clue what they had asked her, but she trusted the twins to an extent. 

The two seemed to freeze, Hikaru sharing a look with his brother before a wide grin spread over his face. He crawled up the bed over to her, placing his elbows on either side of her head. Haruhi suddenly felt much more awake, feeling the presence of Kaoru coming up the side of the bed to watch them. 

“Undress,”

“What?”

“Clothes off,” Hikaru tugged on the bottom of Haruhi’s sleep shirt, still grinning. “You’re up for it aren’t you?” 

“Yeah we can’t do it if you’re clothed,” Kaoru followed up. 

Haruhi glanced between them, nerves licking at her consciousness. What had they been talking about? What had she agreed to? 

“You’re slow,” Hikaru complained, sliding a hand up under her shirt. The girl shivered, then quickly covered her mouth with her hand. Faintly she could hear Kaoru begin to snicker. 

“Cute,”

“We have to be awake by 5-“ A sharp voice cut through the tension of the room, blond hair shining brightly in the moonlight filtered in through Haruhi’s window. “Haruhi?” Tamaki flipped on the large room light, jumping in place. He pointed a finger at the twins, stuttering. The two froze, Hikaru slowly removing his hand from Haruhi’s torso. 

Finally Tamaki settled on something. “BARK WOOF BARK ARF GR GET OFF WOOF BARK ARF!”

“What!” Hikaru jumped back while Kaoru doubled over laughing. “Are you barking at me?” 

“OFF!” Tamaki stormed over to the three, pulling Hikaru completely off the bed. “PERVERT! THAT’S-STOP!” 

Kaoru tried to rebuttal, but just ended up falling into more laughter. His brother blinked owlishly up at Tamaki, mouth comically wide open. 

“WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING TO MY HARUHI?” 

“She said okay!” Hikaru retorted. 

“I DON’T CARE! GET OUT NOW, YOU TOO,” Tamaki turned his hand on Kaoru, shaking, face behind a healthy red. 

Kaoru held up his hands in surrender and scrambled out of the room. Hikaru was still held firmly in Tamaki’s grasp, pale as the bedsheets formerly beneath him. 

“I-I can’t get out if you’re uh-“

Tamaki dropped him to the floor, Hikaru wincing at the impact. On the bed, Haruhi was still processing everything happening in front of her. The realization of what the twins wanted to do suddenly dawned on her as she watched Hikaru follow after his brother. 

“Haruhi darling are you okay?” Tamaki fussed, coming over to adjust her shirt back into place. The girl laughed awkwardly, trying to brush her bed hair down. 

“I’m fine,” She mumbled. “It was just a misunderstanding,” 

“I’ll kill them,” Tamaki stated, deadpan. “Kill them dead,”

Haruhi rolled her eyes at the statement, swatting away his hands. The three would probably just hash it out for a few days then forget it ever happened. That was normally how the club resolved most issues. 

“Do you want me to stay in your room tonight?” Tamaki asked, awkwardly glancing around. Haruhi huffed and pulled her blankets back up over her shoulders, snuggling into them. If Tamaki wanted to stay, he could stay, it wouldn’t be their first sleepover. She heard rustling and felt Tamaki’s weight lifting from the bed. Haruhi hadn’t packed much for the club’s trip, so she wasn’t worried about what he’d find. Maybe she should have been. He had always been one to look just a little too hard. Tamaki grumbled something to himself as he looked around, then went completely silent. 

“Haruhi?” The boy asked, lifting something from her suitcase. Haruhi just hummed in response. She could feel the familiar pull of sleep pulling her back into whatever dream the twins had interrupted. “Haruhi,” Tamaki repeated, leaping onto the bed to shake her awake. Haruhi groaned and sat up, giving the boy her best glare. 

That of which quickly fell into an embarrassed frown, blood leaving Haruhi’s face completely. 

He was holding a strap-on. Her strap-on. 

“Tamaki! Put that back!” Haruhi insisted. She jumped up and tried to grab it only for Tamaki to hold the strap out of her reach. His expression was unreadable...embarrassed but also...intrigued. 

“What’d you bring it for?” The teen asked, holding it higher the more she tried to reach for it. “Planned to use it for anything?”

“T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-Tamaki you baka! Why else would I bring it!”

“Oh~ho~ho~ babygurl,” Tamaki took the strap and tied it around Haruhi’s waist. She squeaked, covering her face with her hands. 

“What are you doing?”

“Use it on me,” Tamaki purred with a smirk. “I want you to rail me,”

This was so embarrassing, no one in the club was supposed to find out about Haruhi’s strap-on, especially not the boy she thought of most while using it. He had to be trying to mess with her, and honestly he was going too far. The girl lowered her hands, batting her eyelashes at Tamaki. The only way to get back at him for messing with her, was to mess with him back. 

“Really Daddy?” She placed a hand on his chest, scooting closer so the tip of the strap-on poked Tamaki’s stomach. He shivered, pupils expanding until the blue of his eyes was just slivers. 

“Yes,” The boy breathed, grabbing it harshly. His other hand came up to push down her shoulders so he was leaning over Haruhi. Tamaki grabbed the bottom of his shirt, lifting it up and off, pants quick to follow. Haruhi felt all the air leave her chest, pussy beginning to throb. 

“You too,” Tamaki insisted. “I can’t be the only one naked,” 

“Y-yeah,” Haruhi kicked off her shorts, then grabbed her shirt just to find it was stuck in the clasp of the strap-on. “It’s s-stuck Tamaki,” 

“I’ll help you babygirl,” Tamaki pulled the shirt out of her clasp and unbuttoned enough to slip it off her shoulders. Haruhi fought down the urge to curl in on herself, skin now exposed to the cold of her hotel room. “That better?”

“Yeah,”

Tamaki hesitated, then leaned down and pressed his lips to Haruhi’s, hands sliding up her torso. The girl whined under his touch, the weight of the strap-on just turning her on more. 

“Do you have lube?” Tamaki asked, reaching for her bedside dresser. Haruhi shook her head. “Damn, I might have some in my room,” As Tamaki got up, Haruhi reached for him, pouting. 

“Stay,”

“I have to go get it baby,” Tamaki kissed the top of her head. “I’ll be quick,”

“We can just save the pegging for later,” Haruhi muttered as she reached down to grab his member. Tamaki’s breath caught. 

“Yeah I guess we can-”

“TAMAKI!” Tamaki felt something soft smack against his face. He shot up, eyes wide as saucers the moment they made contact with Kyoya’s. His friend tilted his head at him, confused. “We’re going to be late, waking you up is a nightmare, come on,”

Tamaki nodded, saying nothing. After a beat passed he pulled his blanket back up over his bare chest. He couldn’t deal with the problem in his pants with Kyoya watching him, let alone change. 

“Aren’t you going to leave?” Tamaki asked. Kyoya just crossed his arms. 

“I don’t need you falling back asleep,” Their manager replied calmly. Tamaki laughed awkwardly, looking between Kyoya and the door. 

“Kyoya, I’m kinda, uh,”

“Tired?”

“No,” He looked down at his crotch, then at Kyoya. The teen took a moment, then his face twisted in disgust. He grabbed a decorative pillow off the floor and chucked it at Tamaki, leaving the room in a haste. 

“Deal with it and meet us in the main room, you’re awful Tamaki,”

“Meanie,” Tamaki mumbled as he watched the door slam behind his friend. With a sigh he shoved his hand into his boxers, head falling back onto his pillow. 

**Author's Note:**

> it's a joke I swear it's a joke please aaaaaaa  
> the girl I like wanted it ebchjebfjabkj


End file.
